MOVE Update, Day 1

Five delays in the church parking lot and one torrential downpour later, we made it safely to Hope College!  Of the eighteen students SLCC brought to this CIY conference, nine have never been before.  God is awesome, and I'm excited about what he is going to do among us this week!

At MOVE, we will be unpacking the story of the prophet Daniel, as found in the Old Testament.  Daniel's story shares many similarities with what Christian students face today.  Daniel was taken from his home, subjugated to a new King, given a new name, and pressured to betray his religion.  In other words, Daniel was tempted to conform.

Students are repeatedly tempted to conform.  Instead of following God's standards for sexuality, our world asks them to conform to a false standard, and tells them that everyone else is doing it.  Instead of valuing God's Kingdom, students - and parents - are told to seek success and prestige.  Why wouldn't we want our kids to get into the most exclusive college or to land the career with the biggest paycheck?  Instead of understanding themselves as having been created in God's image, students are told to fit into the drama club, the football team, the nerds, the popular crowd, or some other social subset.  Those who don't conform are excluded.

Daniel must have felt lost and alone in Babylon, in very much the same way that our students often feel lost and alone.  As we closed out the evening gathering, Bryan Jones, our speaker, told us this: Faith doesn't mean that we will never face trouble, or feel discouraged, or see pain.  Faith means that no matter what, God is with us.  Just as God was faithful to Daniel in Babylon, he will be faithful to our students. 

I'm looking forward to continuing our journey through Daniel this week, and to seeing students realize that God continues to be with them.  Tomorrow our day starts bright and early with breakfast at 7, and a packed schedule of MOVE!  Please pray with me for our student and adult volunteers as we experience this journey together.  Pray that our students new to Christianity will come to know Jesus for the first time.  Pray that our students who feel alone will realize God’s presence in their lives.  Pray that our adults will stay energetic and enthusiastic – ready to serve and to lead.  In all things, pray with me that God will be glorified!

Intimacy, Sex, and Worship

In a Jewish wedding ceremony, there is a chuppah. A chuppah is a sheet of fabric that is held over the bride and the groom. It represents the bond that is being formed between the two--one where such things as "for better or worse, richer or poorer, and in sickness and health" are pledged to one another. The chuppah is a symbol of the intimacy that is being made between the bride and the groom. The chuppah is taken into the marriage chamber and put above the husband and wife before they consummate the marriage (or, as Frank put it Sunday--basket weaving). The chuppah symbolizes the intimacy that is established between the husband and wife.

In the wedding covenant, intimacy and sex are bound together. Husbands and wives pledge themselves to one another, stating things like "to have and to hold, for richer and poorer". There is also a commitment of sexual holiness between one another.

If people lived out these commitments, I believe the world would be a better place. I believe there would be much more joy, because sex at that point is more than just a feeling or something you do. It is a celebration of the relationship.

Unfortunately, in our culture we are distracted by so many things. The intimacy of relationship and sex is cheapened for feeling, thrill, and experiences. Sex has lost its intimate nature. It has become a way to sell things and to give us pleasure. It is something people do now, sometimes as a precursor to relationship, as Walter shared about a couple of weeks ago.

We also overload ourselves with relationships. We live in a culture where we need to know what is going on everywhere. We are connected to Facebook so we can see into the lives of the people we went to school with, and the people we work with. We also share everything about our lives--what we are eating, where we are at, what we are feeling, the frustrations we have. We have no desire to have deep relationship with them, we simply want to "share" information.

In all of this, we have cheapened our understanding of intimacy. We have lost our concept of what private space is. We have lost the depth of what sex between a husband and a wife should be. We have made a mess of our marriages and our relationships.

Now, I know what you are thinking, "What does all of this have to do with worship?" Worship comes from the word worth-ship. The idea is attributing worth to something. Examples of attributing worth can be seen all over. When you put on an MSU shirt, you are attributing worth the green and white. If you have pride in the car that you drive, you attribute worth.

Take that concept and connect it to the first of the 10 Commandments: You shall have no other Gods before Me. In a few short words, God gives us a framework for living. Attribute everything you are to God. If you look at the next 9 commandments, you can see how God is calling Israel to reorient their lives with him as the center. He wants nothing between them and him. He desires intimacy. He desires devotion. He desires commitment.

What if we were to take those statements into our relationships? What if we had devotion and commitment for one another? What if rather than distracting ourselves with this and that, we were to put down our phones and have real conversations where we look into the eyes of the other person? What if lived our lives to attribute worth to our husbands and wives? What if we were to restore the intimacy of the chuppah?

My hunch is that there would be much more joy in our relationships. There would be more depth and weight to how we worship God. And, I bet the "basket weaving" that happens between a husband and wife would be more than a feeling, exchange, or fantasy. It wouldn't just be an experience for pleasure alone. It would be a husband and wife experiencing intimacy, connection, unity, and joy.

Perspectives From a Dad

Thinking about having “the talk” with my son feels the same as watching Jaws for the first time.  Da-Dum.  Da-Dum…  It’s scary and I can’t get away!  I know it’s just a mechanical shark and no one actually got hurt, so why is talking to my son about sex such a frightening ordeal?  I think the fear originates in feeling ill equipped or unprepared.  What do my kids need to know?  What do they want to know?  What does God want them know? 

One local school district begins “the talk” by teaching 3rd graders about the “3 -ates of the animal world”: defecate, urinate, and procreate.  By the end of the 4th grade year, the curriculum focuses on how human bodies change in order to procreate.  The “what” of sex is presented, but the “why” is absent.    

I recall my gym teacher presenting “sex ed” like a real life Mr. Potato Head, the goal being to correctly label the diagram and pass the test.  Unfortunately, the more influential sources of my sex education included television, late night cable movies and pornography that other guys brought to school.  Clearly, this is not how or what I want my kids to learn.

Unfortunately, although my son isn’t in school, he’s already seen highly sexualized images.  Not as a result of unrestricted access to mobile devices or Netflix but because he looked around in the checkout aisle of the grocery store.  A few weeks back, a topless woman on a magazine cover caught my eye in the checkout aisle.  Yes, in the checkout aisle right next to the candy display!  Our kids are exposed to sexual saturation daily.  Conclusion?  The sex ed we find in most schools explains the what but rarely the why. We need to be ready to talk about the what of sex and more importantly the why.  

Why sex?  In Genesis chapter 2:21-24, we read of the first marriage.  God created man and woman and gave them sex.  This act unites husband and wife, brings joy and creates intimacy.  Sex reflects a part of who God is; existing harmoniously in three persons: Father, Son and Holy Spirit.  A closeness that we still can’t quite wrap our minds around.  Similarly spouses can speak wordlessly with a raised eyebrow, a smile, or just a look.  The richness of the relationship is such that often, words simply aren’t necessary.  I want to help my kids understand God’s purposes for sex so they don't settle for Cosmopolitan’s. 

Some resources to help you begin "the talk":
Christian Post
Covenant Eyes
Crosswalk
Focus on the Family
Josh McDowell